簡短英語笑話大全精選
1、A young businessman had just started his business, and rented a beautiful office. Sitting there, he saw a man come into the outer office. Wishing to appear busy, the businessman picked up the phone and pretended that he had a big deal working. He threw huge figures around and made giant commitments.
Finally, he hung up and asked the visitor. "Can I help you?" The man said, "Sure. I've come to install the phone."
一個年輕人剛剛開始做生意，就租了一個漂亮的辦公室。一天，他坐在辦公室里，看到有一個人在外面，于是他就裝作生意很忙的樣子，拿起電話胡吹亂侃，還不停的甩出幾個大數字，好像在談一筆大買賣。
到了最后，他終于掛了電話，問來訪的人，“有事兒嘛?”那個人回答，“我是來給你安裝電話的。”
2、Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?"
"A kid bit me," replied Ivan.
"Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.
"I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."
伊凡鼻子流著血回到家里。他媽媽問，“發生了什么事?”
“一個男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡說。
“再見到他你能認出來嗎?”媽媽問。
“他走到哪里我都能認出他，”伊凡說。“他的耳朵還在我衣兜里呢。”
3、Harry was given two apples, a small one and a large one, by his Mum. Share them with your sister, she said.
So Harry gave the small one to his little sister and started touching into the large one.
Cor! said his sister, If Mum had given them to me I'd have given you the large one and had the small one myself.
Well, said Harry, that's what you've got, so what are you worrying about?
媽媽給了哈里兩個蘋果，一個大一點，另一個小點兒。跟妹妹分著吃。媽媽說。
所以，哈里就把小個的.給了妹妹，自己開始啃那個大個的。
哼，妹妹說，如果媽媽給了我，我會把大的給你，把小的留給自己的。
對呀，哈里說，你拿到的不就是小的嗎?還著什么急呀?
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