英語笑話全集
1.
One day in a drawing class, the teacher told the class to draw an abstract(抽象的) drawing. After a while, a small boy turned his drawing in . The teacher look at it but saw nothing ,only a piece of white paper.
一天美術(shù)課上，老師要同學們畫一幅抽象畫，一會功夫，一個小男孩交了他的作品，老師看了看，可上面什么也沒有，只不過是一張白紙。
"What did you draw?" said the teacher.
“你畫的是什么?”老師說
"A cow eats grass," the boy answered.
“牛吃草。”孩子達答道。
"Where is the grass?"
“草呢?”
"The cow has eaten it up," replied the boy.
“牛把它吃光了。”孩子說
"Well, but where is the cow?" the teacher asked again.
“那么，牛仔哪兒呢?”老師又問。
"It ate up the grass and then went away to drink water."
“吃完草，牛喝水去了”
2.
I Hope So 我希望如此
Neighbor: Do you think your son will forget all he learned at college?
Father: I hope so. He certainly can't make a living by kissing girls!
鄰居：您認為您的兒子會把在大學里學的東西全忘光嗎?
父親：我希望這樣--他當然不能以吻女孩子謀生吧!
3.
Dating for Mother 約會
When the young waitress in the café in Tom’s building started waving hello everyday. Tom was flattered, for she was at least 15 years younger than he. One day she waved and beckoned to Tom again. When Tom strolled over, she asked, "Are you single?"
"Why, yes," Tom replied, smiling at her broadly.
"So is my mom," she said. "Would you like to meet her?"
在湯姆工作的大樓里有一個咖啡屋，那兒總有一位小姐每天都和他打招呼。湯姆有些受寵若驚，因為這位小姐看上去至少比他年輕15歲。一天她又對湯姆招手并示意湯姆過去。于是湯姆走了過去。她問道，“您現(xiàn)在是單身嗎?” “對，是單身，”湯姆滿臉堆笑的`說。 “我母親也是，”她說，“您愿不愿意見見她?”
4.
“I'm sorry ，Madam ，but I shall have to charge you twenty dollars for pulling your boy's tooth .”
“Twenty d ollars! Why ，I understand you to say that you charged only four dollars for such work!”
“Yes，but this youngster yelled so terribly that he scared four other patients out of the office .”
“對不起，夫人，為您孩子拔牙我要收取20美元。”
“20美元!為什么?不是說好只要4美元。”
“是的，但是你的孩子大喊大叫，把另外四個病人嚇跑了。”
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