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爆囧英語(yǔ)兒童笑話
想看更多的英語(yǔ)笑話嗎，盡在應(yīng)屆畢業(yè)生網(wǎng)英語(yǔ)笑話欄目哦。
A Life for a Life(以“命”抵命)
The English author，Richard Savage，was once living in London in great poverty.In order to earn a little money he hadwritten the story of his life，but not many copies of the bookhad been sold in the shops，and Savage was living from hand tomouth.As a result of his lack of food he became very ill，butafter a time，owing to the skill of the doctor who had lookedafter him，he got well again.After a week or two the doctorsent a bill to Savage for his visits， but poor Savage hadn't anymoney and couldn't pay it.The doctor waited for another month and sent the bill again. But still no money came. Afterseveral weeks he sent it to him again asking for his money.Inthe end he came to Savage's house and asked him for payment，saying to Savage，“You know you owe your life to me and Iexpected some gratitude from you.” “I agree，” said Savage，“that I owe my life to you， and toprove to you that I am not ungrateful for your work I will givemy life to you.”With these words he handed to him two volumes entitled，The life of Richard Savage.
英國(guó)作家理查德薩維奇一度在倫敦過(guò)著貧困潦倒的生活，為了賺幾個(gè)錢(qián)，他曾寫(xiě)了有關(guān)他自己生平的故事。但是這部書(shū)在書(shū)店里并沒(méi)有賣(mài)出幾本，薩維奇過(guò)著朝不保夕的日子。由于缺乏食物，他病得很厲害。后來(lái)，由于給他治療的那個(gè)醫(yī)生的高明醫(yī)術(shù)，他才又恢復(fù)了健康。過(guò)了一兩個(gè)星期之后，醫(yī)生給薩維奇送來(lái)了一張討要診費(fèi)的帳單，但是貧窮的薩維奇沒(méi)有錢(qián)來(lái)償付。醫(yī)生等了一個(gè)月后又送來(lái)了帳單，但仍然未索回分文。幾個(gè)星期之后，他又送來(lái)帳單要錢(qián)。最后，醫(yī)生本人來(lái)到了薩維奇的家中，對(duì)他說(shuō)：“你明白，你是欠我一條命的，我希望你有所報(bào)答。” “是的，”薩維奇說(shuō)，“我是欠你一條命，為了向你證明我對(duì)你的診治不是不報(bào)答，我將把我的命給你。” 說(shuō)著這番話，薩維奇遞給醫(yī)生兩卷書(shū)，名叫《理查德薩維奇的一生》。
What Was It She Wanted?
A store manager heard a clerk tell a customer.“No，ma’am， we haven't had any for a while， and it doesn't look asif we'll be getting soon.” Horrified，the manager came runningover to the customer and said，“Of course， we'll have somesoon， We placed an order last week.” Then the manager drewthe clerk aside：“Never， never， never say we are out of anything—say we've got it on order and it's coming. Now whatwas it she wanted?” “Rain.” said the clerk.
一個(gè)商店經(jīng)理聽(tīng)見(jiàn)一個(gè)店員對(duì)顧客說(shuō)：“不，夫人，這會(huì)兒沒(méi)有，一時(shí)半會(huì)兒看來(lái)也不會(huì)有。”經(jīng)理驚恐萬(wàn)分地跑到顧客跟前說(shuō)：“當(dāng)然，馬上就會(huì)有的。我們上周訂了貨。”然后經(jīng)理把店員拉到一邊：“千萬(wàn)，千萬(wàn)，千萬(wàn)不要說(shuō)我們沒(méi)有什么——說(shuō)我們已經(jīng)訂了貨，貨馬上就到。現(xiàn)在你說(shuō)她要買(mǎi)什么?” “雨，”店員說(shuō)。
是哪兩個(gè)詞?
What Are The Two Words?A very nice old lady had a few words to say to her granddaughter.“My dear，” said the old lady，“I wish you would do something for me.I wish you would promise me never to use two words.One is‘lousy’and the other is‘swell’.Would you promise me that? “Why，sure，Granny，”said the girl.“What are the two words?”
一個(gè)非常高貴的老夫人有幾句話要對(duì)她的孫女說(shuō)。“我親愛(ài)的，”老夫人說(shuō)：“我希望你能幫我一個(gè)忙。我要你答應(yīng)永遠(yuǎn)不要用兩個(gè)詞。一個(gè)是‘討厭的’，另一個(gè)是‘極好的’。你能答應(yīng)我嗎?” “噢，當(dāng)然，奶奶。”女孩說(shuō)：“是哪兩個(gè)詞?”
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