經(jīng)典英文笑話集
經(jīng)常講一些笑話，不僅能給自己到來快樂，還能感染他人，這里小編收集整理了經(jīng)典英文笑話集，一起來看看吧!
【經(jīng)典英文笑話1】
The Choice of Word選詞
One day, John was back home after work. He found that his wife was shaking their daughter who was only half a year old. She said "Da-Dy" to the baby many times. John felt very happy because he thought his wife chose the word "Dady" to teach their baby.
During one night several weeks later, John and his wife were waken up by the cry "Dady". His wife said to him, "Darling, she is calling you." Then she turned to sleep.
一天下班回家，約翰發(fā)現(xiàn)妻子在搖半歲的女兒，嘴里反復(fù)念道：“爸-爸。”約翰心里感到美滋滋的，他的妻子選擇了“爸爸”這個詞首先教孩子。
幾周后的一天夜里，約翰和妻子被一陣哭聲驚醒了，“爸-爸!”“她在叫你，親愛的。”妻子說，然后翻身竟自睡了。
【經(jīng)典英文笑話2】
who want to go to heaven
The preacher was vexed because a certain member of his congregation always fell asleep during the sermon.
As the man was snoring in the front row one Sunday, the preacher determined he would teach him not to sleep during the sermon. So, in a whisper, he asked the congregation. "All who want to go to heaven, please rise." Everyone got up except the snorer. After whispering "Be seated", the minister shouted at the top of his voiced, "All those who want to be with the devil, please rise."
Awaking with a start , the sleepy-head jumped to his feet and saw the preacher standing tall and angry in the pulpit , "Well, sir," he said, "I don't know what we're voting on, but it looks like you and me are the only ones for it."
牧師非常生氣，因?yàn)榭傆幸粋�人在他說教時打瞌睡。
一個星期天，正當(dāng)坐在前排的那個人又在瞌睡時，牧師決定要好好教育他一下，讓他不要再在布道時睡覺。于是他低聲對信徒們說：“想去天堂的人，都請站起來吧。”所有的人都站了起來——當(dāng)然，除了那個打瞌睡的人。在低聲說過請坐后，牧師高聲喊道：“想去下地獄的人請站起來!”
打瞌睡的人被這突然的喊叫聲驚醒了，他站了起來。看到牧師高站在教壇上，正生氣的看著他。這個人說道：“噢，先生，我不知道我們在選什么，但看上去只有你和我是候選人。”
【經(jīng)典英文笑話3】
Dumas仲馬
One day a man was taunting Alexandre Dumas，the greatFrench novelist，with his ancestry. “Why，” snarled the fellow，“you are a quadroon;yourfather was a mulatto，and your grandfather was a negro.” “Yes，” roared Dumas，“and，if you wish to know'mygreatgrandfather was a monkey. In fact， my pedigree beganwhere yours terminates.”
有一天，一個人在嘲弄法國大小說家亞歷山大·仲馬，譏笑他的祖先。 那家伙厲聲說：“唔，你是四分之一黑白混血兒，你父親是黑白混血兒，而你的.祖父是個黑人。” “是的，”仲馬大聲回敬：“還有呢，如果你想知道的話， 我的曾祖父是一只猴子。其實(shí)我的血統(tǒng)起始于你的血統(tǒng)終止的地方。”
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